Loosing it ... i normally don't loose my temper ,, well i just get annoyed and then my thinking button starts .. but not tonight .. maybe becoming less tolerant of the same thing? .. i really have the need to swear .. but i also wanna know the psychology behind that .. that wud make me feel better because?? why did i think of swearing ? grrrrrrrrrrrrr .. . i do realize that men are very different from women, how they think and what they are interested in ..but sumtimes so similiar .. i really do not understand why , WHY the need to control the other person exists ... WHY?why can't a person eat or drink whatever the hell they want ? why can't they watch what they want .. why does the person have to be mothered ?? why ?? why do people have the need to emotionally blackmail the other person ? ?? why ? isn't it better if they live with u willingly ?? isn't it more beautiful ??

a song could loose it' s meaning ..if u were gone ?
i cud still need u .. even if u were gone ?
a memory cud penetrate the soul ..even when ur gone ?
a place u can only take ..even if u were gone ?
letting go , even after u left ?
the need to touch u , even if u were gone ?
u have me , even when ur gone ..

only if i wanted anything real bad .. to beg ,cry and weep for it ... i was thinking of mistakes today .. the whole idea behind our existence ... as kids can't wait to grow up , as teenagers , rebellious , silly mistakes .. into early 20's , responsibilities ... 30's and 40's , u've hopefully learned from mistakes (if u have not , good luck) u finally get serious , wake up , start working for a better life ..blah blah ... u don't have much time to repeat mistakes .. by the time ur in ur 30's u must have made the mistake of getting married and having kids (ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa)
i would not like to imagine dad's like mine .. so to support a family u need to grind ur ass ...
arggg the crap i write